From Surviving to Arriving:
My Journey Home
Thank you for being here. I appreciate you wanting to know my story behind the work I do. My path here wasn't a clean, straight line; it has been messy, challenging, and beautifully clarifying all at once.
The Masks We Wear
My childhood was defined by trauma—physical, emotional, and sexual. For years, I believed I could simply outrun it. At 14, when my parents finally divorced, I thought the "monster" was gone, but I was still carrying the weight. I even changed my name to distance myself from the pain: I left "Bobby" behind in middle school, becoming "Robert" and eventually "Rob," trying to shed the version of me that felt weak and broken.
I spent years away from my hometown, flying by the seat of my pants with no intentional plan. I was a "survivor," looking for validation in all the wrong places because I hadn't been taught how to trust myself.
The Turning Point
The pandemic. Sitting alone without any distractions is what finally forced this process out of me. I did not intentionally set out to do this work. This journey has led me to face the things I’d suppressed for years. Through deep work and intentionality, I have received the clarity I needed to stop running. I realized that the "chaos" in both my professional and personal life—constantly moving from one thing/person/opportunity to the next—was not a failure to fit in. It was my calling. I wasn't meant to be in those spaces. I was not meant to be with ‘them’. My calling is to take my experiences, my traumas, my hurt, my pain and use that to help others find their own way out. I firmly believe I was meant to experience what I did so I can use it to help others; I was once told by a Therapist that an adult who has experienced childhood trauma like I did, should not be in front of him. I do not take what happened to me lightly and now accept my role in this life of mine.
Redefining the Unknown
The biggest hurdle to launching this practice was fear—until I realized I couldn't even define what I was afraid of. I chose to remove ‘fear’ from my vocabulary. Our bodies react to fear and excitement in the exact same way; the difference is how we define the feeling. Today, I am learning not to fear the unknown; I just simply acknowledge that it is simply the unknown and continue moving forward. It is constant daily practice and work not to fall back into ‘fear’ but when I do, I remind myself to look around and see what fear has already given me. And that hits differently.
Healing the Roots
Today, my life is much quieter in the best ways. My relationships with my family—once defined by competition, neglect, and trauma—have been transformed.
I’ve learned to see my mother as a human being and a woman with her own experiences within our shared ones rather than my "knight in shining armor," allowing us to finally enjoy each other. This relationship has been challenging and is becoming stronger and more beautiful every day.
I continue to navigate the ever evolving territory of being a big brother - we’re not there but it’s much better, stronger, honest, and more loving than we’ve ever been and there is no longer a sense of competition like in our earlier years.
Most surprisingly, I’ve reconnected with my father. Seeing the man he has become and allowing him to "re-parent" my inner-child has been one of the most soothing experiences of my life. This was and still continues to be the gift that keeps on giving. I am learning so much about me through him. I even gained two more brothers and a step-mother out of this reconnection with my Dad. It’s been soul opening!
I won’t lie about rebuilding family relationships. It’s not easy and it is not for the faint of heart. You have to want it and you have to understand that sometimes it’s one sided work - you might be the only one open to growing and you will need to be ok with that. In my case, I chose to continue even when I was flat out told that ‘they’ did not want to do any of this type of self awareness work because it hurts too much. What part hurts? The part when you have to own YOU and what happened to you. But I continued to stay with my work. I have realized that their journey is just different than mine and I have seen and have heard things differently from them, so it does eventually begin to make a positive shift.
Why I’m Here
I’ve lived through the hurt and the burnout. I know that "bone-tired" feeling of carrying weights you didn't even ask for. Let’s be honest: a lot of us are lugging around "stuff" inherited from parents, grandparents and so on and none of that belong to us.
My mission is to stand in your corner, guide you through the fog, and help you unpack those burdens once and for all. You don’t have to carry it alone, and more importantly, you don’t have to carry it anymore.
I’ve lived it. I’m living it. I get it.
Whether it is your personal or professional life that feels out of alignment, let’s work together to find out why. It’s time to create a path that feels like who you truly are and where you truly want to be.